Jacqui (jacqui) wrote,
Jacqui
jacqui

Cut, what cut?



Hi Everybody,

Happy Valentine's Day! I love Valentine's Day!

These are just two of the twelve or more collages that I'm going to be sending to everyone who was kind enough to send Holiday cards to us.

I'm so sorry it's taken me this long. I scanned these for you so that I could at least give you a little something for Valentine's Day. I couldn't get them to fit on my scanner and ended up cutting off some of the edges. At this rate, I'll have to include bunnies and eggs to go along with the Christmas, Hanukkah, New year's, and Valentine's cards. I swear I have never had this tough of a time making Holiday cards and getting them sent off before. Wow! I'm beginning to wonder about the state of my mind, if I've got some mad case of OCD going on here that can be blamed for this crazed perfectionism and the long delay, or if maybe I can blame it on my health. I'd prefer the latter but I think it's probably more of the former.

I had two super sick teeth that gave me a serious bacterial infection that's had me feeling really weak and rotten for months and months now. We had to do a bit of sleuthing to figure out what was causing all of my symptoms and in the end it all came down to my teeth, well, that and the deep bite wounds and scratches I got from my newly rescued feral cat pal Whitey.

When I went to the pharmacy today a few of my pharmacy pals remarked on how much better I looked than I had the last time they'd seen me. Thank God, because I've been feeling really awful for a long time, and didn't know if I was ever going to be able to turn this thing around. Really, all I've wanted to do for the last several months, is lay here at home in bed. It's all I've had the energy for. I guess this whole thing has been brewing since at least September when I first started feeling so awful. However, no one would have known how bad things had gotten because the one tooth that I knew I needed to have a root canal in was freaky and bifurcated, but hidden by it's crown, and I had already had a root canal in the more seriously infected tooth and it was covered with a crown, which meant that I couldn't see or feel that things had gotten so bad. If it hadn't been for that one piece of candy at the movies, the one that thankfully pulled my crown off, I might have ended up with that needle biopsy my doctor was threatening, and we'd still be wondering what the heck was going on. Anyway, once the crown came off, it was obvious what the problem was, and I think I'll just leave it at that, you don't want to know...

The good news is that with all of this dental work mostly behind me, and two courses of one of the most potent antibiotics out there, (Seriously, this stuff knocked me off my feet, made me so dizzy I couldn't drive), my lymph nodes have shrunk back down to a much more acceptable size, and I guess I don't have Cat Scratch Fever, or anything more mysterious than what was just a reaction to some badly infected teeth.

I'm watching Martha make some kind of lemon curd Valentine cookies. Scott came and left, heh, no, not really, that was Saturday. He took me to the nicest hotel, or well, the nicest room, in a nice hotel. I had a really good time in our gorgeous suite with the super big swiveling TV and the spa tub and am super thrilled and pleased with how well he did at finding us just the right place to stay. He did a great job and really pulled off a super romantic night for us.

Tonight was very low key though because we're home with Beau and we already had our night. Scott gave me the cutest balloons. There's this one huge, pink, heart-shaped one with the sweetest face. It has big round clear circles for eyes, but it's cute sparkly blue mylar pupils are hanging on the inside of the balloon and they wiggle back and forth. We let the balloons go in my room and they floated up to the ceiling, (My bedroom has really high ceilings, two stories tall, major waste of space, especially since we are always running so short on storage), and they're up there now looking down on me, smiling their happy smiles. It's like having a few big, pink cartoon valentine friends to keep me company. Hello cute little smiling Valentine heart shaped balloons.

Scott also got the cutest little Japanese Sanrio exclusive Hello Kitty key chain for me. She's so sweet with her little kimono fabric bow. He also gave me a bunch of vintage Valentines. How wonderful is he this year? Much happiness and fun. Oh and if that wasn't enough, he also bought me a new pair of Birkenstocks because mine were so worn down. They had gotten so shabby that I was embarrassed to wear them anywhere nice, or really anywhere other than say the dog park.

I only gave Scott a bouquet of red carnations. I would have bought him roses at least but he prefers carnations, and that's what matters most, that I got him the thing that he likes best. I used to look down on carnations, but I've been coming around as far as carnations are concerned, especially when you use masses of them, or shape them into balls. I also got him a big box of good chocolates, two Ugly Dolls, and some super cute cards. I think this is the first time ever that he's given me more than I've given him, and after years of always being the one who does so much more for him on holidays, this has really begun to change, and maybe it's okay if he takes over for a little while.

Woah, is Andrea Bocelli blind? How did I miss this? I guess I never noticed before, maybe I thought he just liked to close his eyes when he sang. He's either blind or very, very stoned. I wouldn't wish vision impairment on anyone, but if he isn't blind then he must be high, and it's kind of hard to imagine this amazing singer hitting a big bong, (either that or he's got a bad-ass Valium/Xanax habit going on), before he sings like this.

There was a pretty wasted guy ordering flowers at the flower shop today. He was standing a little too close to me and he had that whole drunk guy patois rhythm thing going on while he was talking to me. I'm guessing he'd had some practice with this because he was able to hold it together pretty well, well enough to seem almost normal to people, but I happen to have had more than my fair share of experience with people who drink, and I have no problem at all recognizing this particular speech pattern.

This was at around one in the afternoon, so I guess he'd gotten a jump on his Valentine celebrations. After he picked up his flowers and left all of the designers and sales people, who were standing behind the counter, suddenly broke out into a chorus of gossipy chatter. Apparently confused about his unusual manner of speaking, and mistaking it for a foreign accent of some kind, one of the women had asked him where he was from. When she mentioned this again to her coworkers, this super sharp and very witty gay man, (I want to mention that he was gay because it's a compliment. There is this particularly bright and speedy kind of humour, a sort of bitter, cynical, appreciation for the absurd in life, that certain people just have a serious flair for. I aspire to this level of bitter wit), said, "Honey, I don't know how you missed that Eau de GIN, wafting all over the place, but where I come from we call that 'accent' Slur."

I don't know, he was just so quick and funny, and we had so much fun bouncing words and barbs back and forth together, I had the best time. Of course it was a lot of fun watching all of the very lost of sort of desperate men trying to throw together emergency, "Baby, you mean the world to me, is this good enough?" last minute floral arrangements. One guy was holding three bouquets so I said, "Let's see, one is for your girlfriend or wife, the other is for your Mom, and the third one is for your sister?" He said, "Nope, they're all three for girlfriends." I said, "You have THREE girlfriends? DO they know about each other?" He said, "You know they do, girl, this is LA!"

I loved being out and about today -- loved being at the flower store, my favorite pharmacy/gift shop, the market, the deli, and Mailboxes Etc. I like being around people I sort of know, or sort of don't know, when there's something fun going on, and holidays are just so much fun. I know people can be rude, rushed, and distracted, but for the most part I think people were out there trying to do some good, trying to let someone they love know that they love them. I really enjoy the feeling of being a part of some big cultural thing. It just feels so communal, ya know, with everyone smiling so knowingly at one another, and making jokes?

I helped two very lost looking Cops find the girlie pink card section at the market, and complimented a guy who had all the right holiday themed ingredients all grouped together at the checkout stand. He had champagne, flowers, strawberries, and a pint of Haagen Dazs Chocolate Chocolate Chip ice cream. Now there's a guy who knows how to please a woman, heh : )

There were a lot of men and women buying up a storm out there today, but it was all so sweet, cute, and pink that it makes it pretty hard to resist. Pink, red, glitter, balloons, chocolate, candies, flowers, candles, perfume, jewelry, romance, sparkle ... anything other than, "Cheney shot so and so," or "Iran is holding an anti-Semitic coloring contest," and you can count me in. I am so there.

Of course I had to tune in Tom Leykis, the man I love to hate, today, because he's just so outrageous that it's hard to believe anyone can get away with this kind of vitriolic woman hating crap, I try to resist but sometimes the force is just too strong with him. Of course he was being his usual dickish self. It's VALENTINE'S DAY, the one day when you'd think guys would feel a wee bit like being nice to their women, so of course he's going to turn up the hate heat. He was encouraging guys to lay low and blow off their women today. He was proud of not having bought anything for anyone female and was encouraging his male listeners to do the same. He had this whole shtick going about how if every guy blew off their girlfriend on Valentine's Day, or just turned off the phone and went into hiding for the day, that there would be this glut of lonely, brokenhearted women, who would go out and hit the bars, just waiting for some stranger to come pick them up, take them home, and screw them, without having to buy any flowers or chocolate. Yeah right, that's what I always do when I'm feeling broken hearted, hit the bars looking for strange men so I can get laid. Men, they really don't get us do they, or well, some men don't. Anyway that was his plan, for everyone to kind of put their women out there to share for the night, you know, just to kind of mix things up sexually, and save on all that dreaded Valentine shopping. I know he does most of this stuff for ratings, but I think there must be some very broken part of his brain, some reptilian part of him that has forgotten that he wouldn't be here at all if he didn't have a Mother who gave birth to him.

Oh wow, Martha just showed us this gorgeous, enormous, red, frufru, heart-shaped box of chocolates that her daughter bought for someone named Kevin. It's huge and she "went all over the city filling it with chocolates from seven different chocolatiers." Oh heaven, what an amazing gift that would be to get. She bought the box on eBay. Lord love eBay. I bought a tiny, vintage, Revere Ware, salesman's sample, cooking pot with a lid, for my friend Atra, and it suddenly occurred to me that it might look nice with a mini arrangement of flowers in it, so I got some floral Oasis, (It's kind of like a green foam brick sponge thing that comes in bricks, it's a basic staple for florists,) filled the little pot with it, and then packed red carnations into a little ball in the Oasis, tucked bits of lavender and green flowers around the edges, and stuck the little pot top into the arrangement with a stem and a big fluffy red bow. It came out so well. It was so cute, and I was super proud of it because I love mini arrangements, but I didn't have my camera, or the time, to take a picture for you.

I have termites eating up the wood in my bedroom, and there's a lot of wood in my bedroom. Doesn't that suck? They're eating the French door to my deck and the beams that run across my ceiling. Of course the one part they're munching the most on just happens to be directly over the spot where I lay my head down at night to sleep. Sigh. I kept waking up with grit or wood shavings in my hair and ears. I thought it was cat litter, and it took me an embarrassingly long time before I finally figured out what was going on.

We brought the tallest ladder I own upstairs today and I had to stand on top of it, not on the top rung, but on the very top of it in order to just reach the beams. I thought we could cover up the cracks with duct tape and buy ourselves a little time before having to call out the termite patrol. Ana, Beau and I took turns standing on top of the ladder, holding our arms out to steady ourselves, trying to tape up the cracks that may or may not be the source of the problem. Hopefully this will keep the termite poop out of my ears while I sleep tonight and buy me enough time to be able to go away to San Francisco for the weekend to see our friends. I'll have to deal with this when we come back. I need to find some kind of organic solution because I can't risk harming our animal friends and it would be super hard to relocate everyone, even just temporarily, and I'm so allergic and sensitive to chemicals. I don't want to do anything to upset my barely recovering immune system. I heard something about orange oil, and Scott mentioned cold microwaves, we'll see. Poor termites. I hate having to kill anything, even little bugs who have the nerve to eat my house and poop on my face.

Well, that's about it from my side of the computer. I think I must have about twenty or more backlogged entries to put up and share with you. I think I may just pull a kind of Orwellian Live Journal trick and place them on their respective dates, as if they'd been there all along, and then put up one entry with links and descriptions. Otherwise, I'm afraid I'd flood your Friend's Lists with more Jacqui chatter than even you're accustomed to, and considering how long my entries tend to be, that's be a lot.

I really hope you all had love filled holidays, even if the love you were feeling didn't come in the idealized romantic form, even if the love you were feeling came from you or me. I love you guys, Jacqui. XOXOX



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