July 3rd, 2002

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Well, it isn't Mercury Retrograde but things have sure been weird lately. Whenever things get kind of screwy and weird I start asking everyone around me if they're having a hard day, and when everyone agrees I check, and it usually happens to be one of those three times during the year when Mercury is in retrograde, but not today. Hunh. Pluto, Neptune, and Uranus are all retrograde though, maybe that has something to do with it.

I've been getting more and more tense and stressed lately, and my neck and shoulders have been hurting so badly I figured I'd better do something about it so I had a great massage with this sweetheart therapist yesterday, and then today I had an appointment with a chiropractor. When I got there the nurse said, "Hi Jacqui, we're so sorry but Dr. Ira hurt his back." I asked her what happened and she said, "Oh, he was moving a refrigerator." What? This is a chiropractor for Fifi's sake. What was he thinking? "Oh la la la la la la I just had back surgery, la la la la la, I think I'll lift this big huge heavy REFRIGERATOR???" I am going to tease him mercilessly about this tomorrow. Nut butt.

When I was leaving the building I asked this cute looking young guy in the elevator is he was having a funky day and he said, "Yeah. I just spent two hours in my doctor's office waiting for a meningitis shot and when it was finally my turn they said they were out of vaccine." Esther's having a bad day, her poor daughter has to transfer schools for the last two months of her school-year, because they moved a few blocks away and that puts them in this other school's zone. She really tried to fight them on this but there was no way around it. Andrea was crying because she loves her teachers and has to leave her friends. She's only seven, how mean is that? Also my phones blew out for some unknown reason. Thank God DSL works. The cats ripped open two of our screens and Harry climbed out the second story window and ended up on the roof again, and Mo peed at me, not once, but twice. It might have been one of the Mo's and then the other Mo, I can never tell, they're twins and they don't like collars. Then Scott called and said he was having a really hard weird day at work. How about you guys? How's it going out there?

I'm watching a car chase on the TV, obviously these guys are having a bad day, three armed robbers...oooh woah their tire blew out and fire is coming out of the rim, and now he's slowing down, looks like they're screwed, the whole back of the car is on fire and the cops are getting out and drawing their guns. This happens a lot around here, it's like some kind of weird sport, watching this on TV. I have the volume off and I'm listening to John and Ken on the radio describing what's happening, they're so funny. Oh well, the whole car is on fire now and the guys are getting out. Cops are arresting them, making them put their arms up and walk backwards, I think one guy got shot, wow, so sad.

Last night I was sitting on our little front porch and going through some mail while Beau was putting away some fun groceries we'd bought at a Japanese market. I must have heard or sensed something so I looked to my right and saw what looked like a huge cat sitting on the fence between my property and our neighbor's. I said something like, "Hi Kitty Kitty", and when it turned to look at me I realized it was a raccoon. It had the cute little masky face and was so pretty and fluffy. I talked to it some more, never dreaming it would climb down the fence and come right up to me, which is what it did.

I was so excited, it was so cute and it came so close to me. I'm talking about three feet away. I was also a bit scared, poor city girl that I am. I got up slowly from our rocking sofa thing, made my way to the door, opened it and grabbed a bowl of dry cat food. I set it down and Mrs. Raccoon Mommy (we could tell she was a Mama because she had big nipples) proceeded to eat every single piece with her hands. So soooooo adorable. Then she looked at us and slowly ambled off. Thinking she might come by again tonight we put some more food out and sure enough, right at the same time, there she was. I got some pictures but I don't know when I'll have the time to put them up.

Look at this great hat I bought on eBay. I swear I could spend the rest of my life sitting in this chair shopping. Ebay is heaven.
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Here are the pictures I promised of our new raccoon buddy. The pictures are truly awful because it was dark and we didn't want to get too close, then I had to reduce them to put them up here, but you get the idea. I'll try again tonight before we leave for the desert.

I really need to live somewhere else, somewhere where I can have land and incite racoons to come eat on my porch if I feel like it. A lot of the neighbors around here are panicked about rabies and see racoons as pests. I cruised around a lot of raccoon websites this morning and became better informed about it. No human being has ever contracted rabies from a raccoon, not that it couldn't happen, I'm not going to try to kiss him like I would with a shark, but I don't see this hungry little trouble monkey as being something filthy and pest like. I may eat those words but for now, she looks hungry and she may have babies to feed.

I think this is someone's racoon journal.
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I just found out that that spot on my Mom's lung is cancer. She just came and told me. I feel like I'm going to throw up. I just found out. I love my Mom. I fucking HATE cancer!!!! I have to call Mary, I'm freaking out. Here I was rushing to leave, there's no way we can go to Hawaii. Mom wants to go, she told her doctor they'd just have to wait to operate. I don't want her to wait a second. I put a call in to her doctor, the lung doctor, but it would have to be the night before the fourth of July. I don't know what to do about Palm Springs, my car is packed and ready to go.
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This is the most horrible day in the world!

Tonight I feel like the stupidest person on the planet. I have this wonderful new neighbor who I really like. I've mentioned her to you before. She loves animals, and has the sweetest dog and cats. I've already upset her enough as it is by allowing my kids to shoot off paintball guns at a target in the back yard on Beau's birthday. One of the kids, and we're pretty sure it was Freddy, good ol' trouble making Freddy, who I'd formerly thought was an angel, shot some balls into her yard and against her wall. It really scared her and she was pretty upset.

Now tonight, sad freaked out shmo that I am, I was on eBay making certain that I had paid all my auctions, and for the first time remembered to look her up under her seller's name. I was so happy for her, that she's just started selling there and doing so well. I looked at her past auctions and her feedback and wanted to come write a little e-mail of congratulations to her partner and to her by clicking on her seller's name.

I entered her name and it took me to her sales page and without even thinking, and meaning to click her name instead, I clicked the GD Buy It Now icon. I didn't even realize what I'd done until the page came up congratulating me for buying her rare glass lamp for SIX THOUSAND dollars!!!! OMG!!!!! I thought I was dreaming, it couldn't be possible. I kept looking at the page thinking this was some sort of mistake, some kind of bizarre joke. I have now ended her auction and caused her partner and her at best a hassle. Worst case scenario they lose the time it takes to relist it and whatever auction fees eBay charges which could be considerable on something this expensive. I'll have to pay them if it gets to that.

I'm just praying that eBay will understand and this won't be a hassle, but the mood I'm in right now I am totally panicking. I'm worrying she will think I did this on purpose or that she'll think something horrible of me. Why????

I have to leave right now. I left a message on her machine and sent a note to the e-mail address registered to their seller name. Oh God help me, I'm in hell, I swear.