July 14th, 2002

Chalkboard

(no subject)

My Happy Interim Life In Maui

Well, here I am in Maui, using a pokey new laptop, but happy to be communicating with you nevertheless. Except for a stupid fight I had with Scott, and my Mother's usual anxious, self-centered controllingness, things were pretty joyful today. I snorkeled and swam in my favorite bay, Kapalua Bay, where I got my advanced open water scuba certification, something I'm truly proud of because it was something that was all mine, and something I did despite my fear, and in the wake of breaking up with my husband.

I got up early, which is always a big win for me, took a bath, cleaned up our room, got Beau up so he could go to the gym with Rosa (Mom's maid) and then I went to the market and bought food for all of us. I drove back happily listening to Hawaiian/Reggae on the radio and loved everything I saw, well, except for a dead mongoose who had been hit by a car, that made me sad. Mostly though I find myself smiling because I love it so much here, love the people, love the weather, love the vibe.

Late,r in the afternoon, I grabbed all my gear and walked to Kapalua, which is the next bay over from where we are staying. I felt my usual shyness but walked myself through it, tossed my stuff down, got out my mask and great new fins, and joined a big group of Japanese people in the water. They were baby snorkelers so I said hello and then swam off. I wished I was under rather than on the water but I still had a great time. The new fins helped me power along at a super fast speed and I swam the entire length of the bay and back.

I saw lots of fish, not as much coral as before, which was a little alarming and sad. There were friendly little damselfish who followed me around hoping for food. A nice snorkeling couple gave me some peas and carrots and I got to hand feed them but the fish hilight was when I got to feed this big fat friendly puffer fish who took it right out of my hand. He had such a cute mouth with one big scraggly fishy tooth. I also saw a sea snake slinking along the bottom. He turned his attention towards me and I beat it out of there, I'd rather tangle with an eel than a sea snake any day. I also saw a small school of squid and floated over them for a while. They were surreal looking.

I may try to work up the courage to go diving, it's just that I've gained weight and it's been about a year and I don't know how much weight I'd have to carry with me and I don't have a BC and would have to borrow one that would be big enough to fit me. I'd also have to find a friendly buddy who wouldn't mind carrying my tank to the water and helping me get it on. So I don't know.

Mom has been her usual self centered grouch puss of a person. She has moments of light and sweetness like when she did a hula for us the other night or when she told us this story about Don the Beachcomber having a friend of hers go out into the forest and hack down some bamboo and make glasses for her because she had said how much she liked his. She's such a jealous competitive little girl though, not exactly the kind of qualities you'd want to have in a Mom. She can't stand when I speak Spanish to Rosa because she's forgotten hers. She'll insult me and if that doesn't work then she'll simply order me to stop.

Tonight in the car I was telling Rosa about Kapalua and how to get there, and Mom just flat out demanded that we stop speaking. In this imperious dismissive tone she said, "Stop that now, be quiet! Stop all the Spanish! We need quiet so we can think about where we're going," and then as soon as we were all stunned into an angry silence, and the focus was back on her where she felt it belonged, she yakked away about herself for the rest of the drive. It's hell on my nerves. Oh and her doctor got her to take Klonopin by convincing her it's for her crazy itching jumpy legs, and it is, but it's also for her crazy itchy jumping nervous system, and all of the suffering beings who swim in it's wake. She dragged us all out to this horrible goochy nouvelle fuss pie of a restaurant, the kind of place that can't just have plain vanilla ice cream for kids, it has to be goats milk ice cream with mango coulis wrapped in a fried green tea leaf, that kind of thing. Of course there was nothing that Beau wanted to eat so he ordered whie rice and sniffed at it to be sure there wasn't anything fruity hiding in there and Mom freaked out, "I bring him to this lovely restaurant and he won't eat a darned thing, there's something wrong with the way he eats Jacqui, you;re going to have to do something about this or he won't have any teeth. is that what you want, for him to have no teeth by the time he's twenty, and yadda yadda yadda extraordinaire..." Poor Beau he just grabbed a toy and ran away. I wished I could do the same thing.

Afterwards we went to see Ulalena which is a popular show here now. It's sort of an amateur local theatre group puts on an interpretational dance history of Hawaii with puppet fish and fat sexy dancers meets Montreal Cirque de Soleil rip off choreographers deal thing. The costumes were great, there were some inspired moments, and the big men were really sexy, I wanted them, but really I think I was just missing Scott. I just wanted to grab these pretty big guys bodies and wrestle around with them and cuddle.

So far I haven't seen one rainbow or heard any good ghost tales. But I have seen some ancient burial grounds, fallen mangoes, green and brown geckos, a big frog, mosquitoes, (those tiny blood sucking bastards,) flower covered trees, baby pigs wearing pink and purple leis, beautiful brown skinned children riding their bikes and laughing, and plenty of lovely leaf canopy pattering rain. Sometimes I think this is heaven.

PS: Someone has been trying pretty darned hard to trip me up into opening virus containing e-mails. I must have had ten of them today and they were all so obvious. Why? What a waste of life force,
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<b>My Happy Interim Life In Maui</b>

Well, here I am in Maui, using a pokey new laptop, but happy to be communicating with you nevertheless. Except for a stupid fight I had with Scott, and my Mother's usual anxious, self-centered controllingness, things were pretty joyful today. I snorkeled and swam in my favorite bay, Kapalua Bay, where I got my advanced open water scuba certification, something I'm truly proud of because it was something that was all mine, and something I did despite my fear, and in the wake of breaking up with my husband.

I got up early, which is always a big win for me, took a bath, cleaned up our room, got Beau up so he could go to the gym with Rosa (Mom's maid) and then I went to the market and bought food for all of us. I drove back happily listening to Hawaiian/Reggae on the radio and loved everything I saw, well, except for a dead mongoose who had been hit by a car, that made me sad. Mostly though I find myself smiling because I love it so much here, love the people, love the weather, love the vibe.

Late,r in the afternoon, I grabbed all my gear and walked to Kapalua, which is the next bay over from where we are staying. I felt my usual shyness but walked myself through it, tossed my stuff down, got out my mask and great new fins, and joined a big group of Japanese people in the water. They were baby snorkelers so I said hello and then swam off. I wished I was under rather than on the water but I still had a great time. The new fins helped me power along at a super fast speed and I swam the entire length of the bay and back.

I saw lots of fish, not as much coral as before, which was a little alarming and sad. There were friendly little damselfish who followed me around hoping for food. A nice snorkeling couple gave me some peas and carrots and I got to hand feed them but the fish hilight was when I got to feed this big fat friendly puffer fish who took it right out of my hand. He had such a cute mouth with one big scraggly fishy tooth. I also saw a sea snake slinking along the bottom. He turned his attention towards me and I beat it out of there, I'd rather tangle with an eel than a sea snake any day. I also saw a small school of squid and floated over them for a while. They were surreal looking.

I may try to work up the courage to go diving, it's just that I've gained weight and it's been about a year and I don't know how much weight I'd have to carry with me and I don't have a BC and would have to borrow one that would be big enough to fit me. I'd also have to find a friendly buddy who wouldn't mind carrying my tank to the water and helping me get it on. So I don't know.

Mom has been her usual self centered grouch puss of a person. She has moments of light and sweetness like when she did a hula for us the other night or when she told us this story about Don the Beachcomber having a friend of hers go out into the forest and hack down some bamboo and make glasses for her because she had said how much she liked his. She's such a jealous competitive little girl though, not exactly the kind of qualities you'd want to have in a Mom. She can't stand when I speak Spanish to Rosa because she's forgotten hers. She'll insult me and if that doesn't work then she'll simply order me to stop.

Tonight in the car I was telling Rosa about Kapalua and how to get there, and Mom just flat out demanded that we stop speaking. In this imperious dismissive tone she said, "Stop that now, be quiet! Stop all the Spanish! We need quiet so we can think about where we're going," and then as soon as we were all stunned into an angry silence, and the focus was back on her where she felt it belonged, she yakked away about herself for the rest of the drive. It's hell on my nerves. Oh and her doctor got her to take Klonopin by convincing her it's for her crazy itching jumpy legs, and it is, but it's also for her crazy itchy jumping nervous system, and all of the suffering beings who swim in it's wake. She dragged us all out to this horrible goochy nouvelle fuss pie of a restaurant, the kind of place that can't just have plain vanilla ice cream for kids, it has to be goats milk ice cream with mango coulis wrapped in a fried green tea leaf, that kind of thing. Of course there was nothing that Beau wanted to eat so he ordered whie rice and sniffed at it to be sure there wasn't anything fruity hiding in there and Mom freaked out, "I bring him to this lovely restaurant and he won't eat a darned thing, there's something wrong with the way he eats Jacqui, you;re going to have to do something about this or he won't have any teeth. is that what you want, for him to have no teeth by the time he's twenty, and yadda yadda yadda extraordinaire..." Poor Beau he just grabbed a toy and ran away. I wished I could do the same thing.

Afterwards we went to see Ulalena which is a popular show here now. It's sort of an amateur local theatre group puts on an interpretational dance history of Hawaii with puppet fish and fat sexy dancers meets Montreal Cirque de Soleil rip off choreographers deal thing. The costumes were great, there were some inspired moments, and the big men were really sexy, I wanted them, but really I think I was just missing Scott. I just wanted to grab these pretty big guys bodies and wrestle around with them and cuddle.

So far I haven't seen one rainbow or heard any good ghost tales. But I have seen some ancient burial grounds, fallen mangoes, green and brown geckos, a big frog, mosquitoes, (those tiny blood sucking bastards,) flower covered trees, baby pigs wearing pink and purple leis, beautiful brown skinned children riding their bikes and laughing, and plenty of lovely leaf canopy pattering rain. Sometimes I think this is heaven.

PS: Someone has been trying pretty darned hard to trip me up into opening virus containing e-mails. I must have had ten of them today and they were all so obvious. Why? What a waste of life force, <iTtee hee hee, I spread a little virus, nanny nanny nanny,</i> stupid little dweebehooers. God, get a life will you, find something better to do, how about helping out a sick child or an elderly neighbor, you're getting awfully pale and sticky looking sitting in front of that computer all day and night dreaming up your evil little worms. Anyone ever explain the concept of karma to you? I think you'd better get with the plan before someone picks you up by your sharp shoulder blades and gives you a God smacking, yop.