August 18th, 2002

Chalkboard

Late Last Night or Early This Morning

I am trying to make myself go to bed earlier than every other night for the past week. That'd be any time before 4:00 am. If I can get myself to bed any time before that I'll consider it a win. I can't talk about my Mom right now. I'm just too sad and burnt out. Thank you so much for your prayers and kind thoughts. I'll fill you in more tomorrow. She made it through the surgery but it looks as if the cancer may be in her lymph nodes. That would mean that it's metastasized. I'm focusing on being super grateful that right now she's alive. As complicated as our relationship is, as conflicted as I may be, as enslaved as I may sometimes feel, she's my Mom and I love her, so I'm relieved for now. Like my "aunt" Jani said, she's the only one like her in all the world. Do you think there are a lot of eighty six year old women who when facing having pieces of their lungs removed through their ribs would want to be certain they have the right lipstick on before surgery? I mean other than Lucille Ball?



Anyway just to lighten things up a bit, here are some great tiki mugs from Munktiki. I saw these on eBay and they're so cute. These guys live in Monterey CA, I love Monterey, and they hand cast and fire these pieces. They make limited editions, give them cute little names and stories and then break the molds, well, that's what they say. They're just so cute with their naughty little nicknames and stories. I like the party bowl with the volcano in the middle that you fill with 151 (Scott) rum, then light it on fire and sip some tropical drink out of the bowl by the rummy firelight. I'm not really a drinker, I can't stand the taste of it, my bladder freaks out, and I get sick, but I like the idea of it.

Now, let's talk about Anna Nicole Smith for a minute here. I like her, or I've liked her for a long time, and not having seen the show yet, I'm not totally sure I still like her. I want to but the clips make her look so well, messed up and boozy or something. We'll see. I just liked that she was a stripper who became a model, that she was cute and trashy, got famous, married a billionaire, got fat, got more famous, became a widow, and then became infamous. I wanted her to get a whole pile of money. I was looking at all of the video clips on E and I feel kind of sad for her. She seems so drugged out and Marilyn Monroe, little country girl, pooty-talk, silly. And I want to smack that happy party pink pushing so called interior decorator. It's so sad, here have some more pink and gold, FABULOUS!!! I'll have a better informed opinion after I see the show tomorrow night. I love controversial reality TV though.

I'm concerned I'm going to alienate my new Catholic prayer circle friends, (I love you and hope I don't, it takes some tolerance and understanding to read my journal because I am a loving and free spirit gal,) but here is the wonderful nude beach that Scott and I went to on Maui, Little Beach. I have been wanting to get here for five years and we finally did it!!! Yeay, I'm so proud of us. It was a walk from the parking lot, across the little bit of big beach and then over the rocky point, but it was worth it. This is one of my favorite memories from our trip. That's Little Beach on the left.



And here are some funny pulp covers. I really like Marijuana Girl.