March 1st, 2003

Chalkboard

(no subject)

Oh God I'm so upset! Beau's little friend Steven brought over another flu/cold virus thing and we're all sick again. I swear one sickness piggy backs on the other. I feel like Flu Tarzan swinging through the jungle from one flu vine to the next. I never get a break. I'm just praying that having this surgery and losing weight will somehow get my immune system back in better working order. It would sure be nice to feel well enough to leave my house to do something other than emergency errands once in a while.

The thing that sucks the most about this is that today is Scott's big awards show day. The JPF Awards are at the Kodak Theatre in Hollywood where the Academy Awards are held. It would be so much fun to go. Scott's song Jah Creation was nominated for reggae song of the year, and I am so looking forward to going with him and rooting for him. I want to support him, not just because I love him but also because I'm so proud of him. Even if he doesn't win, I am just thrilled that he was nominated and is getting recognized for his music. He's so talented and he just doesn't get enough validation from a cold shouldered music business that is only really looking for the next pre-packaged teen talent.

The sad part is that I don't know if I'll be able to make it. Beau seems to be down for the count. I'm sitting up now and typing this to you so I've got some energy but I was up coughing all night, and I am fevery, nauseous, and full of cold. I barely made it to the doctor yesterday. I had to fake relatively good health so they wouldn't panic and reschedule my surgery, and now I don't know how I'm going to find the energy to shower, do my hair, put on makeup and try to look nice, let alone sit through an awards show and be social at a party afterwards. Maybe I'll just act as if, you know, act as if I feel fine. Here comes another cough attack. Maybe I should just lay down for a while.