Jacqui (jacqui) wrote,
Jacqui
jacqui
What kind of idiot goes on Jerry Springer, when their partner asks them to, without thinking they're in for some big bad surprise? You know what I mean? If Scott asked me to go on Jerry Springer, well, I'd say no of course, but I'd certainly start wondering if he was a woman, or if he was sleeping with a guy, or my Mother, or something surprising. I mean how can these people go on this show thinking, dope de dope, this'll be fun, free hotel, woohoo.

Jerry: "So Big Boobed Linda invited you to come and be on the show right?"
Stupid: "Yup, thas right Jaaaarey! Ah luv her. She's mah woman!"
Jerry: "And you don't know why she invited you?"
Stupid: "Well, ah guess for the free food, and cause we like to do it in a hotel shower instead of the car. Oh damn, one of mah teeth jes fell out."
Jerry: "Well, then, let's bring her out. Please meet Linda. Linda has something to say to Stupid."
Linda: "Stupid, darlin, you really piss me off. You make me so damn mad. I hate you! I hate your guts! I wish you'd keel over dead right now. You'ze bad in bed, you don't pay fer nothin, and yer breath stanks. Baby, I'm fuckin yer sister, and yer Mama, and yer Daddy, and I'm a man, and I been strippin, and hookin a little on the side. I don't ever want nothin to do with a pig like you."
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