Jacqui (jacqui) wrote,
Jacqui
jacqui

Sleeping Together With Kids

Beau went to sleep tonight without my help. He didn't need any cuddling and so far he hasn't awakened and come to ask me to help him fall asleep. My poor darling Beau has been having night fears. He has trouble falling asleep because he thinks that someone is watching him as he sleeps from just the other side of the door to his second room. When he gets afraid of sleeping in his room he likes to come and sleep with me. But he is a little bed hog with whirling arms, and my sleeping is so disturbed and light with all of my health complications, that it's better for me when he sleeps in his own room. Plus, I am a tiny bit worried and a little bit ambivalent about our sleeping together.

He's twelve now and while my instinct says, it's fine, I'll know if it ever gets weird and isn't right for us to sleep together, I'm still mindful of how other people feel about this. I even used my ex-brother-in-law's sleeping with his Mother when he was in his late teens as an excuse to judge them. I'm sorry about that now, it just goes straight to my lifelong lesson of every single judgement I have ever made against someone else boomeranging back against me. When Beau was an infant, I was a big proponent of The Family Bed. I read all about bundling. I sometimes think about how George Washington and Martha invited people into their own bed, to sleep with them. I'm also all about battling down the decrepit stodgy old walls of convention. So, just as with breast feeding, we are finding our own way.

Still thinking about that fish...
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