Jacqui (jacqui) wrote,

Pink Scarves and Misery

This is my latest scarf thingy. I made it for Ana, my housekeeper in exchange for the gorgeous shawl that she picked out at my friend Atra's knit show. She thinks she didn't pick it out. She did, she's just nuts, but I had wanted this shawl all along, so it works out for the best.

I am in so much pain right now, deep distressed emotional pain. Hurt turned to anger then turned inwards into a horrible self hating depression. I don't know what to do. I want to die. I know how stupid and melodramatic this sounds but I feel lost, as if someone has just pulled the rug out from under me, or played a mean game of musical chairs, turned off the life support machine -- sorry. You can move freely about the cabin now.


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