I don't understand this, anyone want to explain it to me? I suppose if I had a second to look at it, I could figure it out. I'm guessing the bigger names are the ones I have the most friend's in common with?
Happy Belated Mother's Day's to all of my pals here who are Mothers, who want to be Mothers, and who have Mothers -- that would be all of you I guess ; ) Scott and Beau were so kind and I had the best day I could under the circumstances. It's hard to make time to enjoy the day a little bit for yourself as a Mom when you have other Mom's to take care of and make happy as well. My Mom can be particularly domineering in her own very well meaning way, but then you throw two tired worn out guys who hate shopping into the mix and you can kind of get an idea of what it was like. The funniest thing was when Beau and Scott were walking in to Bloomingdales with me and Beau looked around and said, "The horror!" It was so funny, and he's never even seen Apocalypse Now. He just genuinely hates shopping. It has to be sex specific in some way, you know, built into their genes, because I've never dragged him around and made shopping miserable for him like other Mom's have, so why does he hate it so much?
Oh God you guys, I don't know why I'm even logging in, when I feel so awful, I guess because I miss you guys and when I don't write, to say nothing of reading your journals or coming around and wishing you Happy Birthday on your birthdays -- which of course I'm behind on again -- I feel sad and out of touch.
I haven't had any sleep. I'm sick, so sick to my stomach. I just took every last stomach and intestinal muscle relaxing medicine I could get my hands on and it's finally settling down. Last night I was up all night with Jake, who after getting fed through his new peg (stomach) feeding tube, finally felt well enough to get up on the bed and cuddle up to me, but then at around four in the morning he had some kind of breathing attack and looked so uncomfortable that I just grabbed a robe and went flying for the emergency vet where they put him on oxygen and discovered that he has a lot of air pressing on his abdomen, which was making it difficult for him to breathe. They're gonna have to go back in and do exploratory surgery tomorrow to see what's leaking and why.
When I came home I realized that Zazu wasn't looking any better and was in fact looking worse so I had to turn right around and take her to the vet. She may be having a problem with her liver. We may have to put Zazu to sleep, we've been fighting for her for a year and a half now, she just doesn't seem to want to live. I'll do everything possible to keep her going, to motivate her to eat, and she'll rebound for a little while and I'll be so happy, and then she goes downhill again. So sad.
Beau's birthday is Wednesay so Mom and I are going in on a laptop that will handle his serious gaming needs. I looked at so many before finally settling on a Dell that has the best video card and the fastest processor. Beau takes his online gaming very seriously.
I promised Beau I would take him to this Virtual Snow snowboarding/skiing place for a lesson today so I have to get going. And something smells really weird, funny, like natural gas or a cooking computer, dear God don't let it be my computer.
Big loving but seemingly always weary hugs,
PS: My friend Annina is in The New Yorker today. Diane Arbus took a famous photo of her when she was a young woman living with her parents at a naturist/nudist resort. It's a good article and it's about a friend and fellow LJ'er. Go check it out.