Jacqui (jacqui) wrote,

Oh there's the sweetest thing on the learning channel, this couple is getting married and their showing everything about the planning and the wedding. The couple are so sweet. The guys are playing paint ball for their bachelor party and the gals are getting pampered with manicures and pedicures. Sweet man, he's saying how much he's looking forward to being a husband and a stepfather. Oh the bride looks so pretty, her white dress looks so beautiful against her dark skin, and the groom looks so handsome in his tails. I am such a romantic sucker for weddings.

Man, I hate bachelor parties though. I mean it's just mean and creepy and gross to get the groom to roll up money in his mouth and try to put it up in some strange stripper's puss. I can see how guys might think that is the ultimate in exotic and exciting to get wasted with friends and maybe get a blow job or screw some stripper, but I think it's such a total betrayal to the bride. I mean think of it this way, you're really in love with someone, so much so that you're ready to take your commitment to them to the next level, but wait, let's take twenty-two steps backwards and screw someone else and get puke sick with our buddies, right before we take our vows. What?

I've been to bachelorette parties and I've seen photographs and video of bachelor parties and they are just not the same in any way. The guys are all acting like they have to save the groom from a future life of matrimonial enslavement and drudgery by giving him one last taste of freedom, while the gals are all opening presents and getting misty. If the women have a stripper you can tell they aren't really into it, everyone is squealing and kind of grossed out. Well, at least at the parties I've been too. I don't know about you but I don't want some guy shaking his butt and then swinging his thong wrapped package in my face while he holds the back of my head. Oh yeah weeeee, this is fun!

I feel like I just got up and it's four already, how'd that happen?

Oooh face breaking out, period must be coming soon. Bleh.

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